They say people who have had experience in past relationships are better in handling their next one. I agree. But I believe you don’t have to have a past relationship for you to be the best in handling one.
This entry has been inspired by my relationship with a very special someone whom I have learned and gained wisdom with. And with people who’s lives I have observed and reflected with God’s Word.
This entry is also a continuation of the previous entry: I know I loved you before I met you
Experience is not the best teacher - God is
So I’ve heard…
A girl once told me that she prefers someone who’s experienced in handling a relationship – because he would be more mature as a leader and partner. In all honesty, that made me feel like I’m going to be terrible in one because I have never been in a romantic relationship before.
In essence, what she’s telling me is that she prefers someone who has indulged himself in a romantic relationship and who has learned from trial and error. She’s telling me she wants a man who’s had a give and take of himself with another woman – and has come out a more mature man after he has broke up with his girl. Hmmm…
While I would not disagree that a more mature man is the better choice, I would have to say that there’s another way in becoming the best person you can be.
Experience only knows so much
Experience is a great teacher, don’t you agree? But it’s not the best one. The best teacher would be the One who knows EVERYTHING about life. Experience only knows things through trial and error. It can only know so much. God knows things because HE CREATED THEM. Let me be painfully blunt with you. GOD IS THE BEST TEACHER. And He teaches through the Bible. It is the manual of life – it is GOD’S WORD. I can never stress that enough!
I believe that you can be the best person to handle a relationship through knowing God and reading His word. You can be the best leader in handling a relationship if you let God lead you in life. You can be the best lover when you have known the best lover in life!
I totally disagree with “I want an experienced person because he/she is more mature” thing. No, you don’t have to go through ‘experience’ to be the best person for your future partner.
I’ve seen it
I know for a fact that even if you have no experience at all, you can be the best partner for your special someone through knowing God – gaining wisdom and maturity in and through His Word. And I’ve seen it personally – I am a first-hand witness to love stories that claims the bride and groom to be each other’s firsts.
Do you believe that God can give you that maturity and wisdom through Him – even without the experience of going through a relationship and, of course, a breakup?
I know I do. I believe it with all my heart.
Experience is a good teacher but it’s not the best. God will always be the best teacher – it’s just a matter of knowing Him.
About Sean
very well said!
Thanks Drew!
yeah! i totally agree w/ u ahya sean!
)
most people i know always tell me that having someone as your first and last is a silly idea because of the lack of experience in a relationship but truly we learn more through knowing more about God, the One who IS love
Indeed!
Haha! I'm so glad that you understand and agree with me! And I'm so glad that you're also saving yourself for that someone whom God is keeping for you. Keep yourself strong and keep on wanting to know God more Francine!
If we really trust in Him, then why be scared of going into relationships. Shempre all relationships we go into, we should always treat as "the one." Pero from experience, friends I know who won't go into relationships are scared or have this extremely ideal view of a partner. Oh, and they haven't had boyfriends since birth.
Your type of girls ei?
Haha! It's more of a thing of faith, and again it's related to my article of having standards yet still letting God be sovereign over everything in your life – even in relationships.
It's not about being scared of going into a relationship but it's more of trusting that He has set the right time and right person for you if you only wait on Him. =)
i feel distressed reading this
it sucks because even when i was preparing myself na for that someone God has for me (i’ve NBSB, and yes i garnered already all the wisdom in this post to trust and wait)… suddenly this person came along, we were never official but for so long i’ve struggled with compromise and justification in the process… and then eventually… i knew i already gave little pieces of myself to him… so my reserved 100% is no longer 100%.. 
Don't feel distressed. Sometimes God lets us go through these things to build us up for His glory. I'm going through the same thing right now. I'm still asking God for what His final decision is in this relationship with a girl I'm pursuing. It'd be so much easier if God would just say 'yes' or 'no' but it doesn't work that way.
So don't feel so down. Because everything happens for a reason and purpose even if we don't realize it now. We just have to trust in Him.
Experience makes us a better person and we can learn a lot from it, eitheir its for relationship, business, work etc. Knowing how to solve the problems weve done in the past will help a lot in the future.
This is interesting. My parents are of religious in nature, but never have taught me anything about relationships. I went to religious schools and nil. God knows everything about relationships, but YOU are not GOD and cannot learn everything He knows, even if you read the Bible and is an expert. And, if you remember, women in the biblical age were not talked much about. In the modern times, people change, and you cannot relate to women using your biblical sense. I have done that in high school. I was such a nerd. I am not an expert in relationships, but I am much better because of my experience. Experience is not the best teacher, it is who can learn from that experience is the best teacher of himself.
Good insight. And yes there is no blueprint for relationships – and it is not explicitly laid out in God’s Word. But how to guide and develop yourself as a person is all laid out there. I believe that it is the foundation of being able to handle a relationship – if you can first handle yourself and handle your relationship with God.
how to remove confusion or how to become really sure that u love a person …sometimes it seems like u r forcing yourself to luv that person because you cannot stay away from that person ….i just want to be sure whether i love that person or not…sometimes i feel that i truely love but sometimes i get confused..we meet less n mostly times we stay connected via phone