Can you Really Get Whatever you Want from God?

There’s this common verse that everyone dwells on when they want to claim something that they eagerly desire:

“Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart” – Psalm 37:4 NIV

A verse that may commonly be misinterpreted as “I might be able to get anything I want as long as I delight in the Lord”. But before we go to the desire part – a thought that everyone wants to happily think of whether it’s a dream job, the perfect mate, the salvation of someone dear, or anything else that we fervently want – there is a need first. And it starts first with delighting in the Lord. But what exactly is delighting in the Lord?

Delighting in this context is taking pleasure in the Lord, being close to Him and drawing near to Him. It is a relationship where you are closely walking together and being one. It is a position of happiness alone in God and as he delights having a relationship with you, you experience the same. So what does this mean? As long as I draw closer to him, get to know him and delight in him I get to ask anything and get anything I want?

Not Exactly.

You see, as you delight, that initial desire you had (whatever it is) will never remain the same when you continually walk (delighting in the Lord) with God. Because you begin to get to know who He really is and what He wants, and in that process re-align your desires to His desires. For example, I really have a desire to get married soon and have been asking God to lead me to my future wife. And that has been a constant desire in my heart but as I have been delighting in the Lord and spending time with him that desire has suddenly changed.

What I suddenly desire right now is to be in a position of satisfaction in Him alone. What I want right now is to be able to embrace my singleness and just be complete even if it’s just me and the Lord. It’s not bad to desire to get married but I have finally understood that what He wants from me is not to desire marriage but desire Him. And I can’t find any reason for God not to give me that desire of my heart because that desire is now much more aligned to Him and a product of delighting myself in Him.

This is my desire. This is what I want. That I may be able to say what Deuteronomy 30:20 contain.

“… And that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.” – Deuteronomy 30:20

The Lord is my life.

How to Overcome Jealousy

Jealousy. For many of us who have finished school and are now at work, we think jealousy is so High School. For some men, being jealous is a girl thing. Still for others, it’s for immature people. As for me, I look at jealousy so much differently after attending one Bible Study 3 years ago.

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Guarding Your Heart

Our emotions are powerful decision makers. It is more often used to make a purchase and justify why we need it. It move us as a person. It is a powerful force that can even drive our actions. The Bible often pertains to our emotions as our ‘heart’. The Bible also tells us to guard it. How do we do it?

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How to Overcome the Feeling of Being Used

Recently, I have been thinking about talents. I believe that our talents are given for 2 reasons – to glorify God and to bless others. And since we have a God who is unselfish and loving, He uses us to be channels of blessings to others.

This post has been inspired by the series of events in my life this week that showed how giving, forgiving and good our God is.

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Taming the Tongue

Words are powerful. That’s a fact I’ve come to know in my years of writing, counseling, talking, reading, and dealing with other people. The written word can be carefully thought about before we put it out for the world to see. But how about the spoken word? How many times have we said some things that we wish we could’ve taken back?

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What is Real Love?

In a world where the word ‘Love’ has lost its real meaning in a flurry of shallow statements such as “I love chocolate”, “I love books”, “I love Facebook”, how do we know what it really means when someone tells you “I love you”?

This entry has been inspired by Max Lucado’s book “A Love Worth Giving” which has taught me a huge deal about real love. Parts of this entry has been taken from a part of his book on “Love Believes all Things” I’m writing this entry as the first of a series based on his book. His writings have been a wonderful experience to me.

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Relationships are Messy

It was the resonating voice of reality that echoed through my head as I looked outside the window on a shuttle bound for the city. I breathed a sigh as the thought repeated itself; “relationships are messy.”

Author’s Note: I just had to write this one. Scenarios are fictional.

There was a show on TV last Saturday night that talked about relationships – romantic relationships. And with the volley of questions and answers it seemed there were no concrete answers to anything. I don’t know. Every attempt to answer questions seemed to only bring more questions. And it’s not like the world will stop until we find those answers. No, we are left to live life with such questions hovering over our heads – dumbfounded and confused on what to do when confronted with the issue.

I paced across Krispy Kreme and saw a group of young adults engaged in what seemed to be a very serious conversation. My imagination would suggest they probably have conflicts with some members of their group, discussing their concerns collectively in hopes of coming up with a solution, or maybe just to gain agreement from their peers. I can imagine what they might be saying, “I have my concerns”, “why can’t we just do this instead?”, “I don’t understand.” The litter on their table hinted they might have been there for hours, probably talking about the same issue with the same intensity, and yet still to arrive at a conclusion.

As I was walking to the terminal, a young man passed by. He was talking to someone on the phone, his countenance rather grim and his gestures quite tensed. It could be a problem with a colleague he was working with – frustrated with his seeming apathy and disinterest in the work he does, somehow this young man is left stressed to do what his colleague couldn’t (or perhaps wouldn’t) do. He tried reaching out to no avail. He raised his concern but it was as if he wasn’t heard, and probably at that moment he was on the brink of quitting.

An old lady was sitting at the terminal. Her face was hinted with disappointment, perhaps over a relationship she thought was perfect. She recounted her younger years and traced where she went wrong in her decisions. She must have been reflecting on it for months now. Scars and bruises were on her arms and neck. She had a cane beside her, and from the looks of it she seemed to have purchased it rather recently to aid her limping right leg. Probably her limping leg was also just recently. Her bag was held closely to her chest as she waited for the bus.

A young boy, dressed in white and carrying a backpack, was sitting beside me. He had his headset on, and the volume of his music was probably at its maximum. Despite the noise of traffic, the incessant honking, the sound of engines and the ruckus of ongoing construction, I could hear what he was listening to. It was familiar. It was Simple Plans’ Perfect. His lips were moving with the melody; I can tell he was singing along with it. I wondered what else was on his playlist aside from a song about a son’s efforts to live up to his father’s expectations, and then fail.

I sat down on my office chair, closed my eyes, and thank the Lord for bringing me safely to work. And in my casual talk with God I whispered the same haunting line, “Lord, relationships are messy.” I opened my bible and read His word.

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. – Philippians 2:3-4

And then it hit me. Relationships are messy because people are messy. But God didn’t mind getting His hands dirty in the mess of my life. And if I am to confess God in my life, I should also be ready to dive into the mess of relationships.

It’s not what I can get, but what I can give.

It’s not what people do (or don’t do) to me, but what I do (or don’t do) to them.

It’s not how I expect to be loved, but how I am to love them.

It’s not about me. It’s about the One whom I belong to. And He gives me these commands: to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength, and to love others as yourself.(1)

Relationships are messy because people are messy, but God doesn’t mind getting His hands dirty. And so should we.

(1) CF Luke 10:27, Matthew 22:37-40, Mark 12:30-31

Anger and its Consequences

Anger comes when you don’t need it… and it is actually worse when you do need it. Today, I am going to write about men who made mistakes because of their anger. I’m not sure if any of them had time to eat chocolate, though. Hmm…. what was I writing about? Oh right, I am talking about Ghengis Khan and Alexander the Great. But before I talk about them, let us read the words below.

Ecclesiastes 7:9 “Do not be hasty in your spirit to be angry; for anger rests in the bosom of fools.”

Webmaster’s Note: This was written by Danielle Justine Gan a 14 year old girl who is passionate about writing for Christ.

Alright, I will explain later why I am writing this essay, but as of now, I will tell you about these men first. Oh, and also the reason I wanted you to read the verse above is because though these two men may be smart; they are fools. Alexander was a Grecian conqueror, who practically, took the known world then and made it into the greatest empire in the world. Alexander is a good example of the consequences of anger. He and his men were drinking wine and making jokes about their fellow Macedonians, those who died in battle between them and the “barbarians.”

Clitus, Alexander’s friend, didn’t think it right to make fun of them and expressed it publicly. Alexander teased him for such “cowardice,” at this both of them started a heated argument. The last of Alexander’s patience was thinning. It only broke when Clitus embarrassed Alexander’s reputation as an excellent fighter and leader. This ended with Alexander killing a long loyal friend with a spear. Once he realized what he did, Alexander cried that night and the next morning, and he did not stop until he had no more tears to shed.

Gengis Khan was a Mongolian ruler of a vast empire, but he had a problem with his temper. A good example to show that this is true comes from a story known as “The King and His Hawk.” In this amazing literature, which is retold by James Baldwin, Gengis Khan went out hunting with his hawk on a hot sunny day. Tired and thirsty, he started looking for a brook he saw last time. You see, he went here before. Well actually, a lot of times. Oh well, let’s continue the story. When he found the brook, he took a cup from his bag and filled it with water, may I mention he was getting the water between two high rocks.
When the cup was full, he lifted his hand to drink it, but the hawk flew by and knocked it out of his hands. This happened two more times.

Gengis Khan was very angry, that when he repeated filling his cup, knowing that the hawk will repeat its actions. He killed it with a sword that he held in his hand. His cup flew on top of the rocks, so he had to climb to retrieve it. When he reached the top he found the most poisonous snake lying in the water dead and oozing blood. When he realized what had happened, he instantly felt guilty and sad. He took his friend and brought it home to bury it.

Sometimes, we develop attitudes that harm us more than we could ever imagine. It hurts us so bad that it could never be healed or repaired. The most prominent attitude is rebelliousness. Since every person is born with hard headedness, it becomes much more important that we try to control ourselves. If we become rebellious, there will be consequences, bad ones. To help us to stop being rebellious, we have to be able to keep our temper in check. Keeping our temper under control will help us to yield down, and not make enemies. Do you know that being hot headed refrain other people from going near you?

That is sometimes the reason why it is hard for us to understand the person trying to help us, resulting in us being very rebellious and rude. Especially since experience is a VERY HARSH teacher. When I was young, my mother would always try to get me to improve my character. She especially tries to get me to control my temper, and to say words without making it sound rude. It’s very hard and I practically get annoyed almost every time. She always reminds me to watch my tongue and temper. It’s especially complicated since my temper always shift. From being happy, I become angry, and then I become gloomy. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It just naturally happens… Until now actually.

Proverbs 25: 28 “Like a city that is broken into and without walls, is a man who has no control over his spirit.”

In Proverbs 25:28, which is written above, means (in my perspective) that if a person cannot control their temper, they will end up…. practically busted. Most likely, nobody would want to be with you, or help you for that matter. Sometimes they actually end up in jail. Well, not all of them but you should at least have heard of someone. Let’s just say that if you don’t control your temper, you end up practically in REALLY BIG TROUBLE. And don’t worry there is a twenty percent chance of you knowing someone, who knows someone, who has a cousin who knows someone who ended up in jail because of anger problems. Joke!

James 1:19-20 “So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath: For the wrath of man works not the righteousness of God.”

If you have the book Achieving True Success, then turn to page fifty one. This page talks about Meekness vs. Anger, which is very much related to the topic above. Meekness is yielding your personal rights and expectations, with a desire to serve.

If you are meek, you are strong, for you have won a battle within yourself that is more precious than rubies or gold.
– Danielle Justine Gan (another maxim from me)

Meekness, even if you don’t believe it, has rewards. These rewards are, becoming more understanding and gaining strength. You see, if you become understanding, there would be a greater possibility of avoiding unnecessary fights. Below are two stories. No three…. Well, actually, two and a half…. Just read.

First Story

One time, well just a few minutes ago, my sister came in my room while I was studying. I was really annoyed of course and asked very rudely what she wanted. She came in my room and told me she’s giving me something. We sat on the bed while she presented the gift. When she revealed it, I was happy but not enough to show it. It was a beautiful, fake, silver necklace, with a Papa Smurf pendant. I was so happy, that when she left I felt guilty. Until now I’m wearing it (Papa Smurf looks so cute!) and yes, I really need to apologize later for being rude.

Second story

John kissed Mary’s cheek. Instead of getting angry, Chad, Mary’s husband, asked who John was, and why John kissed Mary’s cheek (in a polite tone). Chad came to know, in a formal way, who John was and why. Which in this case, John is Mary’s younger cousin.

Third Story (Now if….)

Chad asked in a rude tone and let his conclusions get to him. John shouts at Chad. Chad and John will have a fight, and then John and Mary will explain to Chad that they are cousins.

Talk about embarrassing! So you see, understanding the situation would be best for everyone.
Now to talk about strength, when I say strength, I don’t entirely mean being buff and stuff. In the example of Chad and John, you saw one scene, but with two results. Why? It is because in the first scene, Chad kept his temper in check. That is the kind of strength I’m talking about, the ability to control the temper of oneself.

So that you can try to be meek, here is a list of “I wills”
(Founded in the book of achievements)….

1.) I will be slow to get angry.
2.) I will not boast.
3.) I will not grumble or complain.
4.) I will look for ways to help those in need.
5.) I will be willing to go last.

Job was a favoured character in the Bible. I always gave him some respect. After all, my cousin’s name is also Job. Anyway Job of the Bible, was a man who loved God and kept his temper in check. Even if he had leprosy and lost everything he had. In the end he was blessed with twice of what he had.

My Maxim ( I wrote it man! YA!)
People love a man of peace,
They tend to stay away from one with rage,
They bless those who controls themselves,
And have no fear to curse who don’t.

– Danielle Justine Gan

Mahatma Gandhi (Ouch! My mom’s hitting my arm in excitement.), was a “peace maker.” He wanted independence from the British, but peacefully. Though, a lot of his teaching ended in bloodshed, unintentional of course. The reason that this happened is because….

1.) He encouraged civil disobedience to their foreign rulers. Obviously, this will end up with them enraging the British instead.
2.) And also because Gandhi was not with God when he suggested this.

But like what I said before, peace makers, even “peace makers,” are always loved. Now if you want to know where THE Gandhi is, he’s dead, but if you want to meet Gandhi, he is in the hearts and minds of many Indians. Because of trying to make peace, he became their national hero.

Now William Carey, who was also a peace maker of India, was a preacher of the Bible. He translated the bible into forty languages or dialects, possibly more. He is known as the “Father of Modern Missions.” Unlike Gandhi, he fought for God, peacefully, and succeeded, why? Because….

1.) He was doing it for the Lord and not himself.
2.) He did not need independence because he was already free, but he wanted to help the Indians from their false and wrong belief.
3.) He trusted the Lord to do his will, his motto is actually, “Attempt great things for God; expect great things from God.”
So you see, doing things for Jehovah has a good, and a great, cause. Getting angry is alright, but only if it is because someone offended the Lord. In other words, it is more of being indignant. In the Bible, Jesus was indignant twice.

The first time was when he went inside the temple and saw that the temple was being used as a market place. He was so angry that he actually destroyed the stores and let the doves go free. This story can be found in Mark 11: 15-19. The second time was when his disciples tried to shoo away the children that wanted to and see Jesus. He told his disciples to let them come to him, and said in Mark 10:15, “Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.” So it alright to be angry, that is for the right reasons.

3 Ways on How God Wants You to Pray

As we are mostly aware, a conversation is formed by two or more people. Whether close friends, the best of friends, just friends or mere acquaintances. I have learned that it is the same with prayer.

Special thanks to Tom Holladay’s book: Relationship Principles of Jesus.

Many of us mistake prayer as an activity: an act to do before/after meals; before bedtime, before driving. Some also think of it as an emergency button. Something to be pushed in times of desperation, emergency or need. Others think of it as a way to adjust how God thinks. Still some of us however, think of it as a duty, a part of his or her daily routine in order to be good.

Comparing it with our daily conversations, many of us only talk with our seatmate because we didn’t hear what the teacher said about an assignment. Others only had a talk with a colleague because he/she is in very good terms with your superior. And still some only had a conversation with a vendor because he/she is a famous gossiper.

You see, sadly I learned that many of us have shallow conversations with God because we’re used to having this type of conversations everyday. We become too busy and hectic with our own schedules and agendas that we tend to neglect the fact that we had not communicated with God, or not really. We forget the fact that He is very much involved in our lives; our Father and the Lord Almighty.

In Luke 18 verse 1 and Luke 11 verses 5-13, Jesus shares 2 parables of contrast of what God is not. He talks about a Parable of the Persistent Widow pleading to an ungodly judge for justice and an unhelpful friend who wouldn’t lend bread for a friend. At the same time, Jesus teaches how to pray without ceasing.

The widow chose to be persistent with her plea for justice and so the judge agreed. The friend chose to ask for bread with audacity and so his neighbor got up from his bed and gave him. Our choices matter.

1. Be Persistent. Remember when you were 8 and you wanted so bad to go to the amusement park and so you pleaded with your parents to bring you? You gave them all sorts of reasons as to why you wanted to go. You also most probably asked more than at least 5 times, am I right? You kept doing so until your mom said yes or when your dad told you, you can’t. In short, you only stopped when you received an answer.

When we were young, we persisted our parents for something we want because we know that only they can answer and satisfy what want. We depend on them. So why is it that now, when we are older, we forget that God is dependable and He answers ALL our prayers?

Is it because we fear He won’t answer our petty requests? Or perhaps God is not capable of the impossible?

2. Be confident. To answer the first question, we find Luke 11: 9-10, Jesus says “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”

For the second question, we have Luke 1: 37 (NASB) “For nothing is impossible with God.”

Confidence has a lot to do with trust.  Trust has a lot to do with understanding. Understanding only comes when you personally have a relationship with God. So we go back to basics: do you have a personal relationship with God? If yes, then great. If no, then I would understand that this would be quite a big step. But still, I personally encourage you to take it for you will be surprised with what God can do with you. For those that have, please bless our readers and share.

Confident prayers come with expectations. Just like when you call a close friend and asks her to call you back. You expect a call or an answer. Pray expectantly.

3. Be Reverent. When Jesus taught His disciples how to pray, he started with “Our Father, who are in heaven, Holy be Your Name”. Jesus revered His Dad. Note that He has a personal relationship with Him to start with. Then Jesus acknowledges that God is in the realm of power and control. I like how Tom Holladay pictures heaven this way. God is bigger than what you and I could ever imagine. You are talking to the God of the universe, the Creator of all, how then can He not be honored and praised?

We each have our own conversational style when we talk with our friends and loved ones. In this day and time, with the help of technology, we even have different modes too. God however, has no form or style that He prefers. You don’t even have to worry about timing.

God welcomes you to pray. Talk with Him today.

Until God Steps in

Two weeks ago, I’ve decided to stay home on Saturday since I’ve been out on after-office meetings the whole week. It actually gave me the time I needed to catch up on podcasts I subscribe to but barely listen. That time I listened to Timothy Keller, and his message was a bit (well, actually it was a lot) sobering. He talked about having a crushed spirit – its priority, complexity, solitude and how to heal it.

Author’s Note: this one may come across as emo. You have been warned. =p

“The human spirit can endure in sickness,

   but a crushed spirit who can bear?” – Proverbs 18:4

Before, I would often find myself in seasons where I feel disconnected with everyone – that “nobody understands” me or what I’m going through, and people who attempt at doing so will most likely fail. During these seasons I would just lie in bed – confining myself in isolation but at the same time waiting for someone, somewhere to reach out. I would check my phone every so often if anyone sent me anything that would have the slightest semblance of care or concern. I’d have my headset on to drown out both silence and noise while I draw for hours on end, trying to sketch on paper whatever it was that weighed my heart down – struggling to have visual recognition, hoping to make some sense out of it.

Other times I would be in the middle of the crowd, yet still feel detached – often wanting to withdraw.

In all honesty, sometimes I still experience these phases.

I remember one friend back in college telling me, “I wanna understand how you think.” I answered, “Don’t. You’ll go crazy.” I was serious when I said it because sometimes I, too, would reside with the notion that I don’t and can’t understand my own self. All I know is that something was wrong, but I couldn’t determine exactly what it was.

Perhaps back then, I had a broken spirit – one that put its hope on things it knows will eventually be gone, one that I tried to bear but couldn’t. I had a spirit that was confused, disillusioned, and bruised; a spirit longing to receive loving arms and kind words but found none, wanting to give but found no one. I had a spirit that was weighed down, deferred of hope; a spirit that was completely and utterly alone.

In our efforts to heal our broken spirits through self-help books that either ignore or deny the intricacy of our very being – reducing us by focusing only on either our physical, emotional, relational, moral, faith or existential aspect, we discover all the more the truth of our solitude. One may relate to another, but one can never fully understand another.

Perhaps Keller is right – that by consequence of our uniqueness and complexity, we are absolutely and inconceivably alone. That by virtue of our innermost longing to have something to hold on to – things that are supposed to bring us peace, security and the desire to live, and at the same time knowing deep down that everything in this world will pass away, having a crushed spirit is both inevitable and unbearable.

That is, until God steps in.

3 Things you Need to do with Bitterness

Ever had a time in your life when you got so offended that you were cringing with hateful emotions? Perhaps someone shamed you in public or a younger sibling disrespected you in front of friends with whom you hold good reputation? Or perhaps you are denied something – a material thing that you really wanted, or a relationship you were trying so hard to pursue. Unexpected things in life can trigger anger which can lead to hate – which can lead to bitterness.

“See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.” - Hebrews 12:15

The Danger of Bitterness

Almost all murders that have happened in our world today is a result of unchecked anger which planted seeds of bitterness. This bitterness then grew its roots and tightly grasped into its host’s heart and soul – sucking out any good that the host could have done in its relationships with other people.

“Anyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life in him.” - 1 John 3:15

The root of a plant is something that is usually unseen. It is below the surface of the ground it is on. The root is an anchor for the plant – it enables the plant to take shape and grow. Bitterness has been attributed to a root. It goes deeper and deeper into your heart and emotions. And the more you try to weed it out, the harder it is and the more painful.

The plant will grow thorns in your heart – whenever people try to get closer to you, your bitterness will wound them.

Bitterness is a parasite that rots your heart – but the worst part is, it eats up other relationships too.

Bitterness needs two things to grow:

  • A hurting host
  • Time

Results of Bitterness

When you let bitterness grow and establish its roots in you, the plant that results can vary – from murder, slander, gossip, hatred, anger, impatience, divorce, irateness, death, sadness, sickness, depression, etc… Whatever the resulting plant is, it will consequently affect other relationships.

You don’t know it, but bitterness is an act of holding on to a hurt and anger until it has a hold on you. No one wants anything to have a hold on them intentionally – but you won’t recognize that it’s exactly what bitterness is already doing to you.

The Core of Bitterness

Bitterness needs special kinds of soil to grow on. And these can be identified as unforgiveness, being withdrawn, sulking, complaining, grumbling, having a critical spirit, ingratitude, absence of peace and joy, and other forms of self-centeredness. Having these things in your life prepares the way for bitterness to take root. You have to change your heart to good soil in order for you to avoid bearing bitter fruit – and bear good ones.

Consequently, if you allow bitterness to take root, you will lose intimacy with the Lord – making your bitterness an idol. And you will be unable to bear good fruit.

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control…” - Galations 5:22-23

As a Christian, we are called to bear good fruit. Meaning, you have to take away bitterness in you.

“But blessed is the one who trusts in the LORD,  whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.” - Jeremiah 17:7-8

“But whose delight is in the law of the LORD, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither— whatever they do prospers.” - Psalm 1:2-3

Unrooting Bitterness

So just how do you weed out the bitter root? How do you unroot bitterness?

  1.  Surrender to God’s sovereignty. Bitterness drives you to your own desire to be bitter without surrender to anyone.
  2.  Ask for forgiveness from God.
  3. Forgive the offender.

“When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.” - 1 Peter 2:23

Jesus surrendered to God’s sovereignty. He did not harbor bitterness towards the people. He even asked God to forgive them – meaning He also forgave them. He did not allow even one inch of bitterness to take root in His heart.

Do not allow bitterness to take root and hold you. Free yourself. Surrender to God and forgive.