How God Understands Your Loss

By Angelyn

Have you ever lost something? Before you did, did you look for it with all your heart, strength and mind? Frustrating, isn’t it?

I remember when I was still studying and I couldn’t find an assignment I did days ago for our Chemistry subject. Back then, this professor was not only my class adviser, she was also our batch adviser and need be to mention, the most TERROR teacher I’ve met. No kidding, even my mom was afraid of her! So going back, I couldn’t find my assignment. Continue reading “How God Understands Your Loss” »

Leave No Room for Discouragement

By Angelyn

You must be saying, “But we cannot avoid discouragements!” True, in fact, as much as we cannot predict what will happen in a year, a month or a week, we cannot assume we will not experience anything discouraging in a DAY. But how do we react when we are discouraged? Usually, how long do you stay feeling the way you do after the particular incident “caused” you to be discouraged?
Continue reading “Leave No Room for Discouragement” »

How to Control your Desires

By Angelyn

1 Corinthians 10:31 says, “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” I’ve read this passage a number of times but it was only last night that it made sense to me.

Continue reading “How to Control your Desires” »

How Do You Know What Is Right or Wrong If It’s not in the Bible?

By Angelyn

There comes a point in our Christian walk when we get confused whether God is pleased with our actions or not. No, I’m not talking about that sin you find so hard to deal with. Nor am I referring to that struggle you’re constantly battling with going 3 years now. I’m talking about issues that were not EXPLICITLY talked about in God’s Word.

Continue reading “How Do You Know What Is Right or Wrong If It’s not in the Bible?” »

There’s Treasure Everywhere!

By Angelyn

Many times, we fail to see the beauty of things because we are too caught up with OUR OWN agenda and how WE LIKE things to go OUR WAY. And then when the time comes that it doesn’t, we say, “LIFE SUCKS!”

Continue reading “There’s Treasure Everywhere!” »

How to Overcome the Feeling of Being Used

By Angelyn

Recently, I have been thinking about talents. I believe that our talents are given for 2 reasons – to glorify God and to bless others. And since we have a God who is unselfish and loving, He uses us to be channels of blessings to others.

This post has been inspired by the series of events in my life this week that showed how giving, forgiving and good our God is.

Continue reading “How to Overcome the Feeling of Being Used” »

Men and Scoreboards

By Angelyn

Men are being graded everyday. I hate to admit this to the world, but it’s true.

This article is for men out there who would really want to know how to love his girl the way she wants to be loved. This blog is also written in agreement with Dr. Steve Stephens’ book Lost in Translation, specifically on The Point System chapter.

Do you recall the last time you told your partner, “You’re moody again”? That most probably is true, but really you just GAINED a NEGATIVE SCORE. It must be that you are so low, the feelings had to show.

Women are born to be wooed. Whether you as a man like that or not, or whether your girl admits that or not,  IT IS TRUE. It was how she fell in love with you, it was how why she gave her “YES”  and it will be how she will REMAIN.

Men who go out telling other men that women are hard to understand are lazy. These are guys who forgot how capable they were to making their partner happy. They just simply gave up.

Scores can be gained and/or lost everyday. You have to understand that a point translates to the SMALL things you do for her. Sometimes, due to lack of time, resources and other excuses, men are lured into giving the BIG gifts: a new watch, an expensive gadget, a surprise date in a fine dining restaurant, etc. I hate to break this to you, but that still translates to a point; if she’s nice, 2 points may be. Now do you get it why she is not content?

It’s really the little thoughts and gestures that touches a girl’s heart. CONSISTENCY is KEY. This will definitely give you flying colors. If you could consistently do something, then this is most probably what is in your heart. So if you consistently do not inform her of your whereabouts, she understands this as you don’t want her to know where you are. Whereas if you regularly bring home something you know she likes, she understands this as you thought about her. POINT!

It pays to know her language of love as well. Once you know that, MASTER it. I promise you, you won’t regret it.

So what are you waiting for? Score those points today!

Why God Answers Prayers

By Angelyn

Are you seeking for answers today?  Do you have a request you long for God to answer?

Have you prayed about this?  How often have you prayed about it?

This post is an inspiration of my quiet times with the Lord, the circumstances in our country right now, from the movie Hachiko and the book ‘Too Busy Not to Pray” by Bill Hybels.

It is interesting enough that our social media today allows us to connect to one another as easy as a site, as fast as a button and as diverse as a click. Many times, I see posts such as “I wish I had this” and a photo of a modern car or gadget, or something like “I want this for my birthday” and another photo of a desired object.

Nothing wrong with this. But I was reminded today and so in turn, also encourage you that as soon as a desire pops in your heart, would you pray?

Pray that God is pleased with that desire (2 Cor. 10: 5). If He is, then pray expectantly and unceasingly (Micah 7:7).

God is Able.

Due to the gravity of damage the non-stop rains and typhoons have caused, I couldn’t help but ask God for help. I know that He alone can stop the rains. If He Wills it, He will rescue the people. And that He loves our countrymen more than I ever could.

Admittedly, there are times when I feel that my petty request may not have reached God’s ears, that perhaps my desires may be shallower compared to the desires of others. But God through Bill Hybels’ book, told me ‘NO’. He hears my every prayer, He knows my every desire and He can answer (Psalms 50:15).

Today, I was made aware that those times when I didn’t pray with much confidence, it was because I did not have much faith. It was NOT because God was too busy to hear my concerns, rather I did not believe it enough that my prayers could be answered. It was not God with the problem; it was my impatient, faithless heart that is the cause of my prayer-less walk.

If you have felt or understand where I am coming from, dive into Gods Word and know that:

  1. In Joshua 1, Joshua was led and comforted by God in leading the Israelites to the Promise Land.

 “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

  1. In Exodus 16, God provided manna from heaven as food for the Israelites in their journey.

 Moses said to them, “It is the bread the Lord has given you to eat. This is what the Lord has commanded: ‘Everyone is to gather as much as they need. Take an omer for each person you have in your tent.’”

  1. In John 9, Jesus heals a blind man from the goodness of his heart.

 He replied, “The man they call Jesus made some mud and put it on my eyes. He told me to go to Siloam and wash. So I went and washed, and then I could see.”

  1. In Exodus 11: 1-8, God changed the hardened heart of Pharoah to let the Israelites go.

God is Willing.

In line, with His ability, is God’s generosity. Our God owns the world. He created and made everything possible. He willingly gave you your life, those opportunities, your family and friends; all blessings.  How then therefore, could He not answer your hearts’ desires if it so pleases Him?

Matthew 7: 9-11, “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake?If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! “

Don’t leave 1% to doubt or laziness. Learn to pray in 100% confidence to God.

If a dog could wait patiently for his master, as God’s child, won’t you also faithfully wait for Him?

 

Women are Sponges and Men are Turtles

By Angelyn

Women are multi-taskers. They could be talking on the phone on one hand and preparing her child’s sandwich on another. A friend of mine was talking to me about her experience in zipline in Cagayan de Oro then in the middle of it, she remembered her unfinished report on climate change and started talking about that! Random? Not exactly, more on REAL if you’re a girl.

Dr. Stephens describe women as sponges and men as turtles in his book Lost in Translation. Here, I’ll talk about how and why I personally agree with him.

Sponges absorb liquids as much as it can. It doesn’t spill unless you press them. It just takes everything in.

I’m reminded of a conflict between my friend and her husband. For the millionth time, she reminded him about locking the car doors once they start moving. Unfortunately, Curt just doesn’t find this necessary. So in frustration, my sister said, “If I don’t think about these things, who would?”

Studies say that women are more stressed than men. A probable reason for this could be because just like a sponge, they try to take in as much stress, responsibility and pressure as they can. Another reason could be is that women find it hard to say ‘No’ when faced with a task. Still another, they find it hard to let go of a concern and have it go over their minds in all possible angles they know.

Men as turtles, however, do not react this way. When faced with stress, the natural reaction would usually be to roll on their backs. They would not pay much attention to something that makes them feel unsure, undecided and unstable. This way, their shells remain hard, strong.

As my dad would say, “Sleep on it. Maybe in the morning, you’ll get a new perspective on how to solve the problem.” “What if I don’t? How sure are you that I would?”, was how I usually responded.

Let’s have a quick comparison of the two:

Sponges (Usually Women)

  1. Overanalyze concerns. Check every possible detail, look at different scenarios (“what-ifs”) which can add stress
  2. Internalize and admit feelings
  3. Socialize thoughts and feelings

Turtles (Usually Men)

  1. Deny or postpone concerns. Dislike the feeling of uncertainty so would rather think of other things
  2. Suppress “unmanly” emotions
  3. Strategize and act on what to do

Studies also say that men are more stressed than they realize. They don’t pay close attention so they don’t notice stress related behaviors such as forgetfulness, binge eating, smoking, drinking and the like which may already signal stress to their partners.

One important condition that both the turtle and sponge should be careful about is overcompensation. This often times happen without the couple’s knowledge. When a turtle’s shell is too strong, the sponge feels she has to absorb MORE. This way, the sponge says, we can get things done. Then the turtle counteracts what he sees by having a STRONGER shell in order to avoid more drama. This is where it gets ugly.

In reality, turtles and sponges both need to be more familiarized on how each other react in order to work together. Sponges admittedly envy the strong shells of  turtles and really hope they could worry less. Turtles on the other hand should come out of their shells and step up to the challenge.

Why Men Decide Independently

By Angelyn

There was one time in my relationship with Sean that I felt shut out of his ‘personal’ life. He booked an out-of-town trip for 5 days and 4 nights with his  friends and informed me just the night before he’ll leave. I was hurt, disappointed and need I mention? Upset.

This is another addition to the inspiring chapters I have read in the book ‘Lost in Translation’ by Dr. Steve Stephens.

Women love to talk. I remember when I meet with my girl friends over dinner, we’d end around midnight and one of us will be scheduling the next meet-up as we were not yet done discussing her latest issues. We share our personal experiences on how we felt the same way when her partner did this and that. We give opinions on how-tos and what-thens thinking, she’ll know better how to respond when that thing she’s struggling with happens again. Yes, I know men, it’s mind boggling. But this is a fact. It’s how most girls unwind and release tension, it’s how we’re wired, and definitely it’s how we connect.

Men on the other hand, DO what they think solves the problem. They oftentimes, just do what they think is correct. Men see independent decision making as competence; a strength. If they see an issue, immediately they take care of it. As leaders of the relationship, they feel that it is their role to decide on issues. Many times, they think that their partner’s input may and does cause delay, so they just go ahead and do it.

As the book describes: Guys are track stars, girls are volleyball players. However, in life, there is such a thing called trolleyball.

Women feel loved, close and connected to their partners when they decide together. Issues, except for those that a spouse shows ‘no interest’ on, should be discussed. On the contrary, they feel it’s selfish and inconsiderate when men leave them out of the court.

Men need independence. They enjoy movement. Independent decision making allows them to move on with their next to-do things so they could relax and have their alone times. They view interdependent decisions as messy, could be emotional and unnecessary.

Obviously, trolleyball means that the track star still gets his independence and the volleyball player still enjoys her teamwork. He gets his space, she gets her discussions. I know this is easier said than done. But to make a relationship work, there has to be a balance:

Women understanding men as independent beings. It’s not their intention to leave you out of the game but to lead you in it. Men on the other hand, have to realize that discussions heighten closeness. It is not a question of trust or your capabilities but of mutual respect and working together.

As I continue to study this disparity between men and women, I saw that Sean came back from that trip sweeter and more refreshed at work. He was a track star, running his race and I welcomed him home with a trophy. Surrendering those feelings to God was more than worth-it.

«Older Posts